5 Tips for Finding a Platonic Relationship at Work
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For most of us, work can feel like a constant slog of deadlines, meetings, and long hours. Fortunately, there are plenty of ways to make your office feel less like a rat race and more like a supportive community. If you’re looking to strike up a platonic friendship with a coworker, there are a few things you need to keep in mind to make it work. Read on for five tips for finding a platonic relationship at work.
Communicate Before You Jump In
Before you start actively seeking out friends to hang out with at work, take the time to figure out where you and your coworkers fit in with one another’s lives. Not only will this help you get to know your co-workers better, it will also help you decide whether or not platonic relationships are right for you. First, find out what your coworker’s preferred communication method is. Some people prefer to email back and forth while others prefer to talk on the phone or meet in person. If you’re hoping to find a friendly relationship with a colleague, it’s best to pick a communication style that works for both of you. A quick email to “catch up” or a chat about the day’s events will likely be more productive than an awkward conversation on the bus. There are also some communication styles that are better for platonic relationships than others. For example, taking the time to write an extensive email to your coworkers when you have a quick question can help you show you care. On the other hand, sending an email that’s too lengthy or overly emotional will be off-putting. Asking your coworkers how they prefer to be communicated with is a great way to ease into platonic relationships at work. It’s also a great way to let your coworkers know that you’re interested in getting to know them. Communicating up front will help you ease into conversations and make them easier to navigate when they come up.
Make Time for Lunch
One of the most important things you can do to make your platonic relationship at work feel more normal is make time for lunch. Even if you usually grab a quick sandwich at your desk, taking the time for lunch with your colleagues will make you seem more human to your co-workers. It’s important to take time for yourself and your friends. If you have any hesitations about eating lunch with your colleagues, it’s worth taking a step back and asking yourself why. Whether it’s because you feel like you’re “not allowed” to eat at your desk or you just feel uncomfortable, it’s worth considering. While it’s not always possible, eating lunch with your co-workers can help you feel more connected to your colleagues. Asking questions, making connections, and building rapport is an important part of building a positive work environment.
Be Realistic About What You Can Achieved
It’s important to remember that building a platonic friendship at work is different than building a romantic relationship. You don’t need to be able to go on a date, hold hands, and kiss anytime you feel like it. You also don’t need to try to turn your coworkers into your best friends. A platonic relationship is about finding commonalities and building a sense of community. Similarly, it’s important to remember that your colleagues don’t need to see your platonic relationship as a competition. Whether it’s to see how many lunch dates you can go on or how long you can talk to someone before you drop them, it can feel competitive. Remember, your coworkers don’t want to “beat you” but they are happy to see you regularly and make connections with you. With that in mind, here are some tips for being realistic about your platonic relationship.
Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for What You Need
Remember, you aren’t trying to “win” your platonic relationships at work. You’re trying to find a way to make connections and feel like part of a community. As much as it can feel like no one wants to mess with your “romance time,” that doesn’t mean you need to keep your head down and hope for the best. If you’re interested in finding a platonic relationship with a colleague, don’t be afraid to ask for what you need. Whether it’s asking for more time with your colleagues or asking for what you need from the company, it’s important to communicate up front. It can feel awkward, but you’ll be glad you did it.
Don’t Be Afraid to Walk Away
At the end of the day, your platonic relationship at work is meant to be fun. It’s not a competition and it doesn’t need to be a “thing.” If you feel like it’s getting too serious or if you aren’t making progress, it’s OK to walk away. Remember, you don’t owe your colleagues any kind of “commitment” or “relationship.” While it can feel nice to spend time with your coworkers, it’s OK to let your platonic relationships at work go when they aren’t working for you. One of the best parts about finding a friendly relationship at work is that it’s easy to walk away. When it’s time for you to take a break from the friendship, you can simply say, “This isn’t working for me,” and move on. The same goes if you aren’t having fun. If spending time with your colleagues is making you feel happier working in a more isolated space, it’s OK to walk away and find ways to be happy on your own.
Wrapping Up: Finding a Platonic Relationship at Work
Finding a platonic relationship at work can feel a bit daunting. The idea of “friend-zoning” a coworker or “hitting on” a colleague can make many people feel uncomfortable. Not to worry though, it doesn’t have to be that way. All you have to do is follow the steps in this article and you’ll be well on your way to making a platonic friendship at work a reality. With a little effort, finding a platonic relationship at work is possible. It just takes time, creativity, and a willingness to be yourself.
